I'm still gathering my thoughts.  I wanted to write but my thoughts feel so messed up these days. I can't help but browse my previous summer photos. Everything feels lighter and happier. I'm concentrated on my office work. I have spare time to send postcards. I can catch sunsets after work. Last year, I even have spare money from freelance works. I was able to book staycations with my friend A.

These days, uncertainties overpower me. Each day feels like stepping on land mines. I have yet to discover surprises forcing me to step on the shoes of a grown up. There are days when adulthood feels fulfilling. But in my case now, I'm filled with fear. Sometimes, hatred comes along the way. There are people pushing me to my limits and challenging my principles.  

If there's anything that makes me happy these days, it's my family. My parents are doing fine, same with my special brother. Time spent with my cousins is nothing but pure bliss of stories and laughter. 

I hope everything turns out better soon. Things will never be the same again, but I will hold on even to the smallest glimmer of hope. This will not last long. Everything will be fine, in its perfect time.