Hello there! It's been a while. While my posts are diminishing, I don't have intentions of closing this blog.  I intend to maintain and update my silent space here. 

So much has happened in the last three months, I don't even know where and how to start. There are heartaches and some heart warming moments along the way.

After months of waiting, my Dad finally started his eye operation.We are 1/2, we still have to wait another month to address his cataract. Dad's case is a bit complicated. While doing the paperworks and check ups of my Dad, I was reminded of my Mom. I hope she is proud of me. 

Leadership at work is in transition for the longest time. Everything remains uncertain, which includes my employment. 

Work has consumed me and my mental health in the past months. I cried endless times to people who weren't my friends. I sought advice to people I never thought would enlighten me. I reached out to people I never thought would save me. I had cousins who felt I needed help and they came to my rescue. A friend I haven't seen for months obliged my need for company. 

In between the difficult times, I had older colleagues who made everything lighter. I hope I will have more opportunities to work with them. I also discovered hidden betrayals and people conniving against me.

A group of friends decided to cut me off their circle. I remained civil with them. I decided to play the role of the oldest and mature person. My presence would also ruin the support system of someone who needed it more. I had to give way and respect their decisions. 

Four years ago, I made a life changing decision of accepting a promotion at work. I depended to that one long time friend who told me that I deserve the position. She reminded me, I should just learn to manage to my emotions along with the promotion. Fast forward now, I painfully learned how she doubted my capabilities.  Someone told me, my long time friend said that my attitude will not make me handle the promotion. I can still hear her voice, how she encouraged me to accept the position. Yet at the end of the day, she emerged as one of those silently against me. 

I was betrayed. I was living in a lie the past years. I held on to a support system that has been stabbing me. Half of me wants to confront and know the truth behind. But part of me remains in denial and devastated at the same time. 

It's painful that some people I loved and trusted decided to cut me off their lives, while making me appear as the complete antagonist. They celebrate amidst my adversity.

It pains me that people see me as someone who left her friends. But in reality, it was their decision to leave and hurt me. 

If there's anything I remain grateful, it's the fact that Dad and Kuya remain healthy. I have cousins who remain as my reliable support system. I still have people who believe in me. And someone, sent me these messages