I finally have a weekend when all I did is to stay home and rest. It has been raining the entire weekend and as always, I enjoyed the cold and relaxing weather. It's quite a surprise that I didn't avail of Grab Food Delivery. (Much to my wallet's relief) I opted for the usual street food sold by our neighborhood stalls, some chips and ice cream with the family. It's all unhealthy, but I'm all happy. Speaking of being unhealthy, my back pains made its presence again this morning. Though more tolerable, I have a feeling I got it from prolonged sleeping. When I was still consistent with exercise last year, I was spared from any kind of body pain. I felt better even if I have not achieved my normal BMI. These days, laziness and changes at work are giving me reasons to set aside exercise. Though my body keeps on sending me signals that I needed it. 

Days before the weekend, I have thoughts waiting to be written. But for some reason, everything seems to be forgotten as soon as I  start writing my post. The most I can remember, I'm feeling confused and hopeless. 

Much of my confusion arose from the changes that started last summer. There was an unexpected and significant movement from my daily environment, aka work. I'm facing bigger responsibilities. So much is at stake on my hands. Years ago, I used to worry of my comfort zone. Now that changes were implemented, I'm feeling restless and worried. Part of me just want to revert to the good old days. It made me miss the past summers I had with my friends. I look forward to our short lunch breaks, often consisted of silly misadventures. We would rush at 12:00 noon to buy the delicious kare kare at the nearby eatery. We didn't mind walking under the extreme summer heat when we craved for a KFC meal. We will later be surprised with afternoon rains, which left us figuring out how to return for work. We treat ourselves with lunch from Jollibee on paydays. Once in a while, we meet our friend T at our favorite Yellow Cab branch in Manila. Our default order includes Charlie Chan pasta, spicy chicken wings and New York's finest pizza. These days, T is busy with her masteral studies. The only thing that remained constant in my life are the bills to pay, uncontrollable weight gain and the growth of my white hair. :p 

I haven't even detailed the circumstance that led to my current state. The road has been tough, painful and complicated. I wish I could relate everything in detail. Unfortunately, this is not the best time yet. Maybe, when I got everything figured out or when I can already say, I'm in a better state. I'm glad it was over. I survived. I can't wait for the day when I can finally claim those words. 

Meanwhile, on the lighter side of life, it has been all dark and gloomy over the weekend. Whenever I'm home, time is usually spent sleeping, eating, checking out my pile of reads and postcards. Before the week ended, I was able to mail some cards and bought another set of interesting stamps. I can't wait to send them to my friends, Marieken and Terra. 

I'm no longer into fiction reads, at least in the past two or three years. Though admittedly, I still have some pile of unread fiction. But these days, my book purchases involve art, design, fashion and self-help. Also, I've become a really slow reader the past years. My attention span for books only extends to those I can finish in an hour or so. 

Watching movies and series has also been set aside. I easily get sleepy. The times I use my mobile phone is often spent for browsing my Instagram account. But internet connection became problematic last weekend. I checked my offline downloads and saw Touch my Heart in my pending list. I started watching the 4th episode and soon enough, I'm already on the 6th. My long lost cheesy hormones were activated again. :p I'm enjoying everything about this Korean drama. Lee Dong Wook made me smile again. Hahahaha 

It's another week to survive. Wishing everyone a great and productive week ahead!